OK, what I’m about to say won’t make me any friends in the driving school community, but that’s not why I’m here.  My clients are my focus, always were and always will be.  But sometimes I get mad.  Not at my clients, but what I hear about other driving instructors.  It’s way too easy to become a driving instructor.  It’s not cheap, but it’s not that expensive either and there is a variety of quality when it comes to training programs to become an instructor.  Unfortunately this sometimes leads to those who are not best suited to the job being in it.

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Sometimes we get stuck in a rut. We just do the same thing over and over again. Go to work, change into super hero costume, save the world, go home, eat frozen dinner in front of idiot box. Sigh…

That’s why it’s good to shake it up every now and again – rail against the status quo, question authority and maybe not eat out of the freezer once in a while.

Obviously you’ve worked out why yellow is the new black (it’s the MINI’s colour), but why is 90 minutes the new hour?

Because it works. It works for you and it works for driver trainers (but shh, don’t let them know. I want to maintain my competitive advantage). Let’s start at the beginning. For a long time, perhaps for as long as driver trainers have been in existence, the standard unit of work has been an hour; 60 minutes, 3600 seconds. Why? Because it was a neat unit of time. But was it really the optimal unit of time?

My experience says no. Not a little no, a qualified no or a no I won’t have desert, ok, maybe just a little. My no is a flat out, unqualified, don’t try and tempt me, get out of here kind of no. Frankly 60 minutes blows for you and it blows for me.

Why? Reasons for you; one hour means you are quite limited in the available distance you can cover. This limits driving opportunities for new road conditions, different and new roads and probably something else too. I always like to use three examples. The second reason is that with just one hour, it feels like you’ve just warmed up and suddenly it’s over. Reasons for me; reference reasons for you. As a driver trainer, i want you to try something new, get your confidence level up and not to shut you down after you’ve just got started.

There is another reason why it is better for me and this time it’s all about me. I can fit more teaching time into the day. In between each lesson, a good driver trainer leaves 30 minutes. This allows him or her to finish up a lesson, write in the logbook, have a little chat at the end, jump back in the car and drive safely to the next lesson, maybe accompanied by a little down time listening to the radio (ABC Classic FM or ABC Radio National or ABC 612 Brisbane – now that’s a pattern) or maybe a CD of some fine music (Kate Miller-Heidke is on strong rotation at the moment).

So all of that to come to this conclusion. 60 minutes bad. 90 minutes good.

Heard as I drove through Indooroopilly McDonalds dive through, “Oh my God! A MINI driving school.”

No wonder Mavis the MINI is getting a big head. But I agree. The MINI is an awesome driver training car.

Well, close the shutters and draw the curtains folks.

Crash Test Dummy is all booked up this weekend.

But drop me a line for next weekend.  There’s still a couple of spots free.

See you on the road!

If you grew up in the ’70s like I did, well good on you for a start. Gen X are currently in the ascendency. One day we won’t be and everything new will be scary and we will constantly talk about how music peaked in the ’80s.

Anyway, if you are my age you will have seen Romper Room on Channel 7 For those who didn’t have the pleasure, it was a children’s show a bit like Play School, but not as cool.

Anyway, anyway, one of the regular segments was where the presenter would look through a magic mirror and list off about a dozen names like she could see the children.

“I can see Bob, Wendy, Jimmy G.” etc.

I was reminded of that this week when what was looking like a pretty quiet weekend turned out to be anything but with a flurry of 4 new students in 24 hours.

Looks like I’ll be spending the weekend saying hello for the first time to a pot of new clients. I promise not to use a magic mirror though!

Whenever you exit a roundabout, you must indicate to the left.

Why? So people know where you are going!

No picture required for this post. I think you can all visualize it!

Have a great weekend if you are reading this on a Friday. If not, substitute “weekend” with whatever is most suitable 🙂

I see a lot of strange things driving around.

Just today I saw a vehicle trying to upstage Mavis.

Sorry my dear M, this one had some street cred!

– Posted from my iPhone – pretentious mode on 😉

Queue the drumroll…

2010 has been a great year here at Crash Test Dummy.  And what makes a great year?  Students.  It’s been a real pleasure getting to know them and helping them on their journey to independent driving.

“Yes, we’re different, but then again, so are you!”  It might be our slogan but its also our credo, so as head dummy, or sensei if you will, no probably dummy, I dug into the folder of those I taught during the year to come up with a list of category winners for the 2010 Crash Test Dummy Awards.

If you’re not mentioned, don’t think it’s because you didn’t make an impact on my life somehow.  Everyone did in one way or another as I would like to think that I did.  Anyway, without further ado…

THE BAND-AID AWARD – Fruzsi.  Everyone knows that the best way to pull off a band-aid is to rip it straight off and that’s what Fruzsi did.  First lesson on Saturday, another on Sunday, you guessed it, Monday too, Tuesday makes four days in a row and Wednesday she passed her test with flying colours!  Fruzsi also picked up a few other awards during her super short stay at our driving school.  They include MOST AWESOME FIRST NAME AWARD, even though I never got up the courage to ask her the origins of it, the INTIMIDATE THE INSTRUCTOR WITH MY INTELLECT AWARD when I realised how super intelligent she is, the I WONDER WHAT SHE’S THINKING AWARD, which went hand in hand with my paranoia about how smart she was because she chose her words wisely, the SUPER CALM AWARD because of her reaction to new driving environments and finally Fruzsi’s ultimate accolade, THE BIGGEST MINI FAN AWARD because of her long standing MINI addiction.

(I know that last one is going to be a bone of contention with some of my students.  After all, more than 80% come for the MINI and hopefully stay because I can add something to the equation too.  There were LOTS of big MINI fans this year and Mavis thanks you dearly.)  Now on with the awards…

THE BLACK UTE AWARD – Jacqui G.  It came out of nowhere and disappeared the same way.  But is sure did wake us up that Sunday morning.  Like Fruzsi, Jacqui G. is the recipient of more than one award.  The GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION OF WHAT A STATE OF TERROR I WILL BE ON THE DAY OF THE TEST AWARD for letting me know early in the piece what an emotional wreck she was going to be on the big day.  Of course, it turned out in retrospect that she was quite calm about it all, despite the examiner taking her on a route which we hadn’t practiced.  The ROUND AND ROUND THE ROUNDABOUT AWARD is also Jacqui’s for conquering her fear of the dreaded big circles which plague our roads and finally, the MAKE ME LAUGH LIKE NO ONE ELSE AWARD, which is kind of self explanatory.

THE SMOOOOTH AWARD – Bo.  I didn’t know anyone could drive Mavis so smoothly.  Bo made it feel like Mavis had only one gear, like a CVT gear box for those in the know.  I still don’t know how he did it, but nice one.  Bo is also the recipient of the DEEP PHILOSOPHY AWARD, because of our talks about the important things in life and finally, the STUDENT I AM MOST AFRAID OF IF HE DOESN’T PASS AWARD.  Only kidding, Bo’s got a heart of gold plus he passed first time round.

THE OUT OF LEFT FIELD AWARD – Eddie.  Eddie already had his driver’s license when he rang me up, but hadn’t driven for a while so he thought it responsible to take a few lessons.  How awesome is that?  Which leads to Eddie’s second award, the HOW AWESOME IS THAT award.  Eddie’s final award is I’VE REALLY GOT TO CATCH UP WITH EDDIE FOR LUNCH AWARD.  Parting with some students is such sweet sorrow, because you know that you can’t teach them anymore or they have passed their test, but you’ve enjoyed their company so much.  Next time I’m in the city Eddie, we’ll catch up for lunch!

THE ALREADY HAVE A MINI AWARD is a tie between Racheal and Lisa.  Lisa maybe just edges ahead because she was before Racheal and wanted to stop her husband having all the fun driving their MINI.  Lisa also picks up the HOW FUN IS EMERGENCY STOPPING award thanks to the big, wide and open expanses of the Boondall Entertainment Centre carpark.  I encourage everyone to test both the stopping ability and the stopping and steering ability of their cars in a safe, controllable environment.  Thus ends the safety lesson.

THE TOOK ADVANTAGE OF MY GENEROSITY AWARD – a three way tie including someone I didn’t think would. Obviously not any of the people mentioned above, but (hang on, a four way tie actually) as a driving instructor, I have a pretty generous nature which is just a byproduct of who I am as a human being.  Sometimes it’s my time, sometimes it’s measured in dollar terms (actually a five way tie – I should stop thinking about it) but I didn’t get into this industry to make a huge amount of money, but to make a difference.  And just as I think I’m generous with my own family, I’m generous with the students who trust me to instruct them to be safe drivers on our roads.  Like any generous person, which lots of my students are too 🙂 sometimes I get taken advantage of.  But I won’t let that stop me being who I am.

Looks like the Award people are giving me the wrap up sign so I better make this quick.  Before the last awards are mentioned, I would like to thank my family for supporting me during 2010 as a driving instructor.  It has made all the difference in the world and is the reason why I am also happy to get up in the morning, hang the Qld Transport validation and Blue Card around my neck and go to work.  Thanks also to Mavis, who is not only a great car to drive to work but who is also very patient with students young and old.

Honourable mentions go to the KING OF THE MOUNTAIN (MT. COOT-THA) AWARD recipient Brendan for restraining himself in the dips and bends, Christina for the ALL AROUND NICE PERSON AND SPOOKY HOSPITAL AND IS THAT A BUNCH OF KANGAROOS AWARDS, Susie for the YOU’VE ALREADY DONE YOUR 100 HOURS AND THERE’S NOT MUCH I CAN TEACH YOU AWARD, Tahmina for the TAHMINA IS AWESOME AWARD and finally, Lauren, for both the FINALLY A FEMALE STUDENT WHO LIKES THE AIR-CONDITIONING AS COLD AS I DO AWARD (as an aside, about 90% of my students are female) and the THE SUN HAS GONE DOWN, VISIBILITY IS LOW AND I’M GOING TO TURN LEFT NOW RIGHT HERE, YES RIGHT HERE AT A 90 DEFREE ANGLE AT 60 KPH AWARD.  Actually, I’ll also give Lauren the GIVE THE DRIVING INSTRUCTOR A FEW MORE GREY HAIRS AWARD.

OK, all my capital letters are feeling really worn out now so that’s it for 2010.  I look forward to 2011 and all the new students it will bring and all the experiences we will have together, as well as all the chocolate Freddos and Caramello Koalas that shall meet their untimely ends.

Winners are grinners.  So Mavis (our automatic MINI Cooper D) has been smiling from headlight to headlight with the news that the AAA (Australian Automobile Association) has just announced that the MINI Cooper D is the best small car in Australia over $35,000.

Kind of makes you wonder why the only Brisbane driving school which teaches lessons in a MINI Cooper D is Crash Test Dummy.

Certainly not our students.  They love the qualities which make the MINI such a special little car (though Tardis like on the inside).

The D for diesel makes a big difference to new learners.  It has a boat load of torque, just perfect for those low speed manoeuvres and generally any occasion where you don’t want to wring the neck of the engine to get some power out of it.  Oh yeah, I guess that’s about 99% of the time for students.

Pepper White - Yum!

The judges had the opportunity to sample a Pepper White Mini D and I must say it is a fabulous colour, especially with chocolate brown stripes.  Mmm… Chocolate.

P.S.  Did you know that all of our students receive a free Freddo Frog or a Caramello Koala at the end of each lesson?  If your driving school doesn’t, ask why?

Of course it’s not just people who’ve circumnavigated the globe by boat that we take driving here at Crash Test Dummy.  The mostly land bound are also welcome.

Just today I got a really nice unsolicited reference from a former super student of mine; she’s so super in fact that I call her Super Jacqui.

Anyway, here it is in all its unedited glory.

P.S.  If I ever get a negative review, I promise to post that too.

P.P.S.  Thanks Super J.

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Tuesday 30^th November 2010

Dear Dave @ Crash Test Dummy,

I would like to take a moment to thank you for your endless patience, and notable skills that have assisted me in finally getting, at 29 years of age, my very own drivers license.

It was undeniably your unfailing faith in me as your student that got me through my driving exam – All I could think as I hyperventilated through each practical manoeuvre  – “Dave taught me this, I know this” ! I was so well prepared I feel I could have done those manoeuvres in my sleep.

Thank you for your patience, kindness and faith – lets not forget about what a great teacher you are either!

Yours Sincerely,
Jacqui G

PS. Give my love to Mavis, I miss her zippy little ways